Chaos, Craft, and the Balancing Act: Running a Business with Bipolar
Running a small business is already a lot. But running it while carrying the weight of bipolar disorder, ADHD, PTSD, and OCD? That’s a whole different level of hustle one that doesn’t come with a rulebook but comes with real struggles and small wins.
The Conflicts Inside My Head
Each diagnosis comes with its own set of battles and sometimes they play nicely, but often they clash like glitter and carpet.
Bipolar: Some days I’m unstoppable, running on endless creative energy, cranking out new designs and plans like a machine. Other days, the depression side hits, and I feel like even checking emails is impossible. The highs make me dream big, the lows make me doubt everything.
ADHD: My brain is a constant brainstorm. A hundred ideas at once, but struggle focusing on one. Deadlines sneak up on me, distractions win, and I’ll spend hours reworking something that doesn’t even really matter to everyone else.
PTSD: Triggers can pull me out of the moment fast. Loud noises, stress, or even certain memories make my body go into fight-or-flight. That means sometimes business must pause while I regulate myself.
OCD: The flipside of distraction; I can hyper-fixate on small details until it’s “perfect.” Which sounds good, but it can eat hours of my day on things no one else would even notice.
Together? It’s like juggling fire, water, wind, and stone. Each pulling me in a different direction while I try not to drop the business I’ve built.
Self-Care Isn’t Optional but a Struggle
With all this going on, self-care isn’t some luxury add-on. It’s survival. Am I good at it…. Not At All! Do I tell everyone to work on it…Yes, cause it reminds me to.
Routine: My schedule and systems keep me grounded when my brain wants to fly off in a million directions. Shout Out to Brandi @ North Of Now (www.North-ofnow.com)! I struggle with schedules and routine because ehh…but she has helped so much in finding a process that works for me as an individual with my brain juice power.
Rest: Learning to step away before burnout hits. Even if I’m anxious about the “to-do” list, I try to remind myself: rest is still productivity.
The Battle with Sleep
Sleep should be the reset button but sleep often feels like another full-time job. Insomnia shows up uninvited. Racing thoughts that won’t shut off, replaying conversations from the day, planning tomorrow’s to-do list at 3 AM, or just lying there with anxiety humming under your skin.
The cruel part? Lack of sleep makes every symptom worse. Mood swings hit harder, focus slips faster, triggers feel bigger, and obsessions loop louder. It’s like starting the day already ten steps behind.
Support: My squad of creatives and small biz friends keep me sane. Sometimes we talk business, sometimes we just FaceTime in silence while we work. Community is therapy.
Family and Relationships
This balancing act doesn’t just affect me; it affects the people I love.
My kids are grown and doing their thing, but they see the grind and know how much I pour into my business.
Relationships with friends and partners take understanding. Some days I’m all in, and other days I’m all out. The people who stick around are the ones who get that it’s not personal, it’s my wiring.
It’s not easy explaining why one week I can run my business like a powerhouse, and the next I’m curled up just trying to breathe. But honesty and boundaries keep those relationships intact.
My Business as My Anchor
The wild part? My business is both my challenge and my therapy. It gives me structure, purpose, and joy, even when my brain feels like a storm. Creating tools, connecting with my community, and seeing people excited over something I made, that’s my medicine.
And if working on my business all day is what makes me happy, then that’s my happy place. Period.
The Bottom Line
Balancing bipolar, ADHD, PTSD, and OCD while running a business is messy, exhausting, and complicated. But it’s also empowering.
Thank you for hearing my rant……